We interrupt our regularly scheduled travel programming for a dash of relationship RX. Ok, its 2014. Do you want to improve your relationship? What is your plan? As the New Year begins we want to help you find a few little ways to spice up your relationship. We asked some of our favorite relationship gurus for the one thing that would help couples the most. They came up with some pretty incredible ideas. Regardless if you have been together two weeks or two decades, these tried and true suggestions will make a huge difference. Pick one of these things and give it a try in the new year!
1) I really appreciate it when you….
We are continually on a journey of learning to love each other. Ask your partner for a list of 10 things they would like to be appreciated more for and how they would like it said. “I really appreciate that you almost always cook. It’s so great.” Then, make a point to say these things over the next 30 days. Maybe they will like it so much, they will ask for your list.
2) Love or Like
For just marriage advice, probably our number one is “Love them even when you don’t like them. Respect and care for your spouse even when they are being annoying. You can find a way around irritating.”
3) Create a Loving Ritual
Want to warm up your relationship quickly? Show your appreciation on a regular basis! Whether your partner does something big or small, tell him or her how much you appreciate the time and effort. You can also create a loving ritual where you share three things you appreciate about each other every time you see each other or if living together, before you go to sleep. This is a wonderful way to connect and acknowledge your partner and keep your love alive.
Ronnie Ann Ryan— www.NeverTooLate.biz
4) Trust Each Other
I’d encourage couples to work on developing trust. For some, that means trusting that the occasional cold wind or thoughtless gesture from our loved one is not the harbinger of doom for the relationship. For others, it is as simple as asking our spouse for what we need and trusting that they will do that for us. Vulnerability is required to build intimacy and trust is at the core of that vulnerability.
I’d encourage couples to work on trust. Lack of trust can keep us from explicitly asking our spouse for what we need from them. Why even ask if we don’t trust them to respond? Even worse, a lack of trust can make a thoughtless gesture feel like the harbinger of doom for the relationship which, ironically, can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you trust in each other’s love, there is always hope to move forward and get over the bumps.
Just a reminder…You can ask the Fighting Couple ANYTHING!
5) Be on the Same Team
Sometimes love can feel like a battle. Your sworn partner so easily becomes your enemy. It’s important to remember that you are on the same team. Start this year by creating a team name, and use it when you travel, do home projects, go to a stressful event. It can be as simple as Team Sabatini.
Jessica Sabatini— FindingMyRealLove.com
6) Spice it up!
Has sex in your marriage become routine, scripted and boring? It doesn’t have to be this way. Profound sexual intimacy is possible when you devote yourself to understanding what arouses your spouse. Explore each other’s bodies this year with a renewed focus on touch, foreplay, tenderness and passion.
Julie Sibert— www.IntimacyInMarriage.com
7) Take a vacation!
If there is one thing that we would encourage couples to do is to block out some time to travel together. There is something special about getting away from all the stress of work, family, and every day life. Make time for a couple trip. Leave the children with grandma and get away together.
The Fighting Couple— @1000Fights
We truly hope that these ideas give you some helpful objectives to work on together. Relationships are so hard! Add in the pressures of work, family, and everything else sometimes the most important person in our life takes the back burner. Every year at this time, we set goals to lose weight or earn more money. Are you setting goals to improve the most valuable thing in your life, your relationship? We wish you the very best in your relationships this year!